Our Big Trip

This weekend we took Fiona on her first trip away from home. It began Friday when we left the house at 8:37am, the earliest we have ever left (when not going to the airport at the crack of dawn). We drove for several hours because Fiona took a two hour first nap. We stopped for gas once, went to Starbucks and I nursed Fiona and also drank a tea latte. I saw another mother nursing there and thanked her for doing it in public. Yes, I have become a lactivist. But I digress.

After we filled up the tank, we went to a lovely rest stop with very new and very clean toilets and air dryers that can blow your hand off. We sat on the grass in the shade and let Fiona crawl around and stretch her legs. We also ate lunch. When we got back in the car Fiona was a little fussy, not bad, but a little bit uncomfortable. We stopped at the next rest stop which was not as nice as the first. After more nursing and walking around in the fresh air, we got back in the car and Fiona promptly fell asleep. This time she slept for about an hour. We arrived at Keith and Judy’s, my friend Jen’s parents’, at around 4pm, 7 1/2 hours after leaving home. They fed us a delicious dinner and we had a very pleasant evening.

Here are some photos from our rest area breaks:

 

We tried to stick to Fiona’s usual schedule of taking a bath around 6:45. She had a hard time falling asleep because she was not in her crib, but in a Pack-n-Play play yard. She did not sleep well and eventually I just cuddled her and then we all slept a lot better. It was really cold and she is like a little heater and kept me warm all night. You would think it would be the other way around.

The next day began with a huge and yummy breakfast, followed by running errands, and then a nice hike that saw us crashing through large bushes of mustard, thistle, and grass that was taller than John. Fiona spent about half of the hike sleeping in the Ergo. We did a tick check at the car, but when we arrived home we discovered some had escaped our search. We found two or three altogether. One was on my sleeve – scary! We washed all of our clothes and changed Fiona out of hers. No one was bitten, thank goodness. We had a nice meal followed by Mud Pie in honor of Keith’s birthday. I will not say how old he is, but I will say he easily looks ten years younger. Jen’s family has great genes. Fiona slept a lot better the second night and spent the entire night in her own bed. It unexpectedly rained a lot for some reason.

Here are some photos from our hike. Apparently, mugging for the camera was theme of the day:

 

Sunday morning was beautiful, not a cloud in the sky, and we busily got to work setting up for Jen’s baby shower (the reason we were visiting in the first place). I hosted it together with Judy and Britt (a friend and former housemate/landlady of Jen’s). John picked up food that I ordered, Britt decorated, and Judy set up drinks, cups, utensils, plates, and other things. Keith cleaned up the backyard and set up tables and chairs everywhere. You see, we were expecting over 20 guests. I arranged the activities – tie dying burp clothes and onesies, decorating onesies with fabric markers, writing “inspirational” disaster stories for Jen, and a collage table that no one visited at all. All in all I think it went really well. No one made collages, but that’s ok. Jen is the proud owner of many colorful and interesting onesies for her son. He will not go naked for lack of something to wear. I ordered waaay to much food, but now I know for next time.

Planning and organizing the shower from far away was not that difficult and I am glad that it went over without a hitch. While I was at the shower John took Fiona to a petting zoo/farm and she saw all sorts of animals including brown cows and a goat that she petted. He reported that she ate her first raspberry as well, but he did not take any photos. He had the camera so I have no photos of the shower either, which is sad because Jen knows some very artistic people who made onesies look like works of art.

We went out for dinner on Sunday night and Fiona ate Thai food, and lots of it. She ate Pad See Yew noodles and chicken, sweet and sour pork, barbecued pork, a little bit of tofu, some other kind of chicken, and lots of rice. And she liked all of it. We kept her out later than usual, but she was great, no melt downs or crying. However, she did spend the latter half of her night sleeping in bed with me again.

We rose early today and ate a simple breakfast. We packed up the car and headed out. It took less than six hours to get home because we only had to stop once because Fiona fell asleep for two hours after our first and only gas stop.

It’s good to be home.

Here is Fiona sitting in the doorway, chewing on John’s sunglasses case:

Now, what about Fiona? She really enjoyed Keith and Judy’s house. The carpet provided soft cushioning for any falls she had and most of their furniture is the perfect height for pulling to a stand. I think she spent more time standing up than sitting down. She crawled all over the place and was “talking” up a storm. Her vocalizations are becoming much more purposeful and she is making lots of different types of sounds now.

Here is a video of her standing up:

Last, here is a video from a few weeks ago. In it Fiona is babbling a little and it sounds like she says “thank you” and “dada” with purpose, even though she probably isn’t saying anything at all:

Someday

There is a children’s book called Someday. I read it in Babies R Us and started crying right there in the store, while carrying Fiona in the Ergo. John walked up and I told him that the book made me cry. He read and had the same reaction. We spent the rest of the day feeling sad that our little girl is going to grow up one day and leave us.

What the heck is wrong with us?!? We want her to grow up, big and strong and independent, and to move out one day. To live on her own and have adventures, to see the world, and start her own family (if that is what she wants).

And one day we will pass away.

I hope she always knows how much we love her.

Lactivism

First, a quick story. John just showed me a Youtube clip titled “Panda Mother Hugs Baby Panda”. In the clip, the baby panda is on a branch. The mother panda walks to branch, picks up the baby and sits down with it. John narrated it like this,

“See the baby panda? Look there goes the mother. She picks up the baby. Puts the baby on boob.”

It really wasn’t that obvious what the panda was doing. My dear, dear husband is now able to recognize when other animals are nursing. He recently encouraged me to nurse Fiona indefinitely, instead of weaning in August (at 14 months) like I plan to do. Two of the many reasons I love him so much!

So what is lactivism? According to Wikipedia, lactivism is advocacy for breastfeeding. Advocates are called lactivists. They come in many shapes, sizes, and ages. All lactivists support the idea that “breast is best” and want breastfeeding to become the norm in the United States, instead of being seen as some sort of weird or alternative behavior.

I LOVE breastfeeding. I love the bond I share with Fiona. I love being able to touch her little feet or feel her little hands when she eats. I love being able to sooth her without any toys, and not worrying about food because I have everything she needs right now. Sure it would be nice to drink and eat indiscriminately but I don’t mind watching what I put in my mouth because it means that I don’t have to worry about what goes into Fiona’s mouth.

Breastfeeding came easily and not easy at all. Fiona latched on for the first time when she was 33 weeks gestation. She was triggering let-down (when the breast fills with milk) at 35 weeks. She always had a good latch and a strong suck so I never had to worry about sore nipples or other problems many women face when they attempt to breastfeed. However, I had to wean Fiona from bottles because she was 99.99999% bottle fed when she came home from the hospital. I spent many weeks full of tearful nights and frustrating days teaching her to nurse from me and waiting for her to have enough stamina to feed herself and still gain weight, and not spend 24 hours a day eating. It was all worth it and left me thinking that if I can do it, anyone can.

I should also add that Fiona LOVES breastfeeding and will crawl to me in bed and attack even when she is not that hungry.

What to feed a baby and how is a personal choice. I recognize that breastfeeding is not for everyone and not even an option for some. If a mother has to go back to work immediately, she does not have time to establish a good breastfeeding relationship with her baby. Not everyone has the money to buy a good (read: expensive) pump or the time and space at work to pump as many times a day as is necessary to maintain her supply. I do not hold a grudge against women who have to or choose to give formula to their infants.

However, I recently had a couple of encounters that left me wondering about my beliefs. First, I met a woman and her husband who had school aged children. They told me their firstborn arrived a little early and had jaundice. By the time the next child was born, they wised up. They were ready with the formula. The second encounter happened last weekend. I was in Babies R Us and I saw a mom and a baby. I think the baby was in it’s first month of life judging by the dark circles and helpless look on the mother’s face. She had a large can of formula in her basket and she fed a rather large bottle (the same size Fiona gets, parents tend to over feed formula babies) and I suddenly felt so sad. I was sad for the baby that it wasn’t going to experience the wonder of breastfeeding, and I felt sad for the mother that she is going to miss out on the wonderful feeling of nourishing her baby, and the soothing magic that breastfeeding has on a crying baby.

Then I wondered, have I become a lactivist? I cringed inwardly when the woman in the doctor’s office told me she didn’t even try to breastfeed. So many women don’t. Or they try, but lack support from family, friends, spouses, employers, society at large. Or they think that there is something wrong with their milk or that they don’t have enough because their baby eats all the time. New babies do eat frequently and for long periods of time. That does not mean they are not getting enough milk. Also, a lot of time, they aren’t really eating, they are comfort sucking. If one doesn’t know the difference between eating and comfort sucking, it’s easy to think that the baby is eating for an hour and then hungry again, therefore there is something wrong with the milk/there is not enough milk. It’s easy to second guess yourself if you do not have all the facts.

And who knows? Maybe that baby in Babies R Us was initially breastfed but his mom is on some sort of medication that prevents her from breastfeeding. Or maybe he was allergic to her milk. I don’t know because I did not ask her.

I guess my whole point is just that I am surprised by how sad I felt at the baby with the bottle and how grating it was to hear about not even trying to breastfeed because of some imagined fear. I thought women who said they were sad for other people’s babies had too much time on their hands. Now I’m one of them.

Here is my little sumo wrester, grown chubby from drinking lots of mommy milk:

An update: I think I really am a lactivist because when I went to the Strawberry Festival I saw a lot of moms bottle feeding their infants and I assumed they were all getting formula. I thanked a mom in public for breastfeeding, while she was doing it. I am sad at the prospect of weaning and think I might wait longer than I originally planned.

Sigh.

California Strawberry Festival

Today my mother, John, and I took Fiona to the California Strawberry Festival. It was her first trip on a bus:

First encounter with a bale of hay:

I nursed her when we first got there, then she went around in the Ergo for a long time. We ate strawberry nachos from my school’s food booth and looked at crafts. We bought some wooden toys for Fiona to play with:

Then we ate corn on the cob and papusas, which are flat bread stuffed with cheese and with some stuff and sauce on them. It was all very yummy. Even Fiona enjoyed it (both the papusa and the corn), as well as the lunch I brought for her. She is an eating machine lately:

 

My mother and I sat and chatted while John took Fiona to go play and burn off some energy:

It was very crowded at the festival. Shortly after lunch we went in search of strawberry shortcake and Fiona fell asleep in her stroller:

We ate the shortcake and then I purchased a flat of strawberries for $9. The berries are beautiful and red and DELICIOUS!!!! Some of the best strawberries I’ve had in a long long time. So sweet and juicy and perfectly ripe. We have eaten half of them at least already. I do not think they are going to last the week.

When we arrived home Fiona played with her new toys and also a box of granola bars:

She played outside in the grass while I made dinner (which she also ate, along with her own dinner and a nursing session):

   

In case you are wondering, that is an orange she is playing with.

After dinner, we gave her bath to scrub off the dust and dirt from the festival and the backyard, and I bushed her teeth for the first time. I used a toothbrush and toothpaste made especially for babies that I purchased last week.

All in all it was a long but satisfying day.

A Trip Back…

I’m titling this blog post “A Trip Back…” because I am going to discuss the last two weeks in reverse order, starting tonight and working backward. Today we met with Nikki at a local park and she took pictures of Fiona and of us. Fiona was very serious but I think Nikki got some good shots. It was windy and cold, but Fi persevered. I’ll get those photos soon. This morning we went to the pool for the last swim lesson. Fiona wore her very cute bathing suit and seemed to enjoy the water a lot more than last time. We took a shower at home (her first and I don’t think she liked it) then went to lunch. At lunch, for the first time ever, she ate everything by herself. John ordered pancakes and eggs and I had an omelet. We put little pieces on the table in front of her and she ate them. We didn’t feed anything to her, put everything in her mouth by herself. I am very proud of her!

This week Fiona pulled herself to a stand without any help. She pulled up in her bassinet, on me, on my mom, on the couch, on a box of magazines. She also slept through the night one night and so did I. She likes to chew on carrots. She also likes the ice teether. It looks like I am holding her up in the photo on the right, but I was not touching her at all.

 

 

Fiona had her first cold and she had chest congestion, not just nasal congestion. We had to give her nebulizer treatments. The nebulizer looks like a dog and is called the “DoggyNeb. I had to give her a treatment in the doctor’s office and she hated it. John and I worked out a system whereby Fiona sits on his lap and he holds the mask over her face. I sit in front of her and distract her for ten minutes. I wore a bowl on my head, played my voicemail for her, read her books, did anything to keep her from having a complete meltdown. I’m happy to report that her junky sounding cough and raspy breathing seem to have healed.

One more tooth broke through. I got a good look in her mouth and it turns out that she only has six teeth right now. Her incisors on both top and bottom on the left have not yet broken through, but are very close. I hope it happens soon and that we get a little break from teething. 

Fiona went to the bank for the first time and also went to a Mexican Restaurant. The food was really good and Fiona ate rice and beans. She wasn’t eating as much at the beginning of the week because of her stuffy nose, so I was really glad she ate something. She lost a little bit of weight. She liked chewing on the straw.

Last weekend was really rough. Fiona was teething and got a cold. Her nose became congested and she had a hard time sleeping because she couldn’t breathe through her nose. It was hard for her to soothe herself with a pacifier. She was so drooly that one day we had to change her clothes twice and then gave up and put a bib on her. We went to a birthday party at the park and Fiona had lots of fun. I’m glad because she spent the morning crying miserably. We gave her ibuprofen several times last weekend.

 

 

The little girl wearing Fiona’s hat is Lyla. Both girls were wearing the same pants and purple shirts. It was really cute.

John and Fiona had fun exploring the back yard. Fiona is less than one tenth of John’s size.

Fiona reading an Indestructible book. This book can be washed in a washing machine and dried in a dryer. In fact, I think it already has been. It can be chewed and pulled and crumpled and will not tear. Fiona has several and she loves playing with them. She likes to look at them during diaper changes.

 

Doesn’t she look like she is just bending down? Trying to help me clean up instead of making the mess?

 

Today, she pulled up on a basket and “walked” her way around it! She was also miserable after a tough night. The three teeth that are coming in are giving us a lot of trouble. She was whiney and crying. My poor little baby:

 

I have two videos to post soon. One of her exploring a box of magazines and standing up in the process, and one of her eating puffs and talking to us, but it takes a really long time to upload them to Youtube so it will have to wait for another post.

And last, it was John’s birthday last week. I gave him 5 new shirts, two new pairs of pants, and new camera. Many of the pictures in this post were taken with the new camera. It has a touch screen and of course it is a Nikon. We ate sushi for dinner on his birthday, and I did not go to class because my mother had a cold and could not watch Fiona. She is all better now and I went to class this week.